Romans 12:16-17 - Be of the same mind toward one another; do not be haughty in mind, but associate with the lowly. Do not be wise in your own estimation. 17 Never pay back evil for evil to anyone. Respect what is right in the sight of all men.
Message: Do not be self-focused, but thing about others and what is best for them.
Time: Written in AD 57 from Greece, to the Christians, both Gentile and Jewish in Rome
What the Lord is Saying:
I continue to walk rather slowly through these marks of what it means to be a Christian. As is Paul's custom throughout this book, he repeats. There are similar ideas here in some of these phrases, and yet differences.
Be of the same mind toward one another
This is an interesting phrase to me. I am to live in harmony with other people. If Paul is mentioning this here, like this, then my guess is this is not necessarily natural. It is tragic because, on the surface, it appears that many Christians do not live like this toward other people. Instead, I see a policeman mentality so much of the time with ministers of the gospel policing what is truth. It seems like Christians become the judge in society for what should be right and wrong. Is that our role? Are we to take on an offensive attitude? Yes, we are to defend our faith, but it seems that defense takes on the form of separation.
Could it be that we are not of the same mind because we are not bathing ourselves in the Word of God like he expects of Christians? And so being of the same mind is harder.
I just think this is a hard principle. I feel like in this section of scripture Paul is writing characteristics of the Christian and what it means to be a Christian. He has gone through the Law and Grace and the theology of Grace, but now he gets to direct application.
To be honest, I think this is a phrase that is easy to say, but hard to extrapolate the exact meaning. Yes, it is important for me to live in harmony with other people. There should be peace, kindness, unity in feeling, interests and objection. I mean, in some ways, Pamela and I had to leave Hoffmantown because we started to realize that we were having a really hard time with this idea. We were not of the same mind with the people in that church. It was like they were at one place and we were some place very different. I do not think that I was just trying to get my way. But, I did feel like because there was such a separation of thought that it was not doing any good for us to be there. It was doing more harm than good.
In marriage, I see that Pamela and I are of the same mind. Do we agree on everything? No. Do we do things the same way? No. But, we believe in the marriage and our children. We are focused on making it all work. We have the same objective and so we can work through all the situations. We are not giving up even though at times we feel like giving up. I think the Spirit is alive in our marriage. I think the unity we share in Christ allows the Spirit of God to work through both of us and cements us together. Being of the same mind is possible, but it is definitely only possible when God's Spirit is at the helm and is allowed to work.
Do not be haughty in mind, but associate with the lowly
I am not to be arrogant in actions, but even in my mind. I am not to conduct myself in such a way as to make myself out to be more important than others. The Christian should not put forth the idea that because they are saved, because God has rescued them and made them holy, that they are somehow better than others.
I think this is a real danger of a believer. I think because of their understanding they make themselves out to be superior to other people. But that misses a right understanding of the gospel because we are not in the faith we are because of our righteousness, but God has grafted us in, and so we are to give Him all the glory.
And the complement of this thought is I am to associate with the lowly. Boy, this is hard when you are not accustomed to this. That I should go out of my way to associate with the lowly and who would be the lowly? If it is the homeless guy on the corner, asking for money ("Will work for food") then how do I associate with him? Do I take him out to eat? Could I spend more time with the lowly and bring them into my home?
Do not be wise in your own estimation
I should not put myself up on a pedestal. I am not to uphold myself as being the wise one. In this statement is an attitude of boasting in myself. Proverbs 3:7 states something similar: "Do not be wise in your own eyes; fear the Lord and turn away from evil." A part of this is don't think that you know what other people are going through when you haven't gone through what they are going through. Don't assume that you know another person's perspective.
I think I make assumptions about people's faith sometimes because of the label I place on them. I am learning to not do this. Every person has a different story. Each person has a different testimony of how they came to Christ and so each person will also have a different story as to how they have not come to Christ.
Never pay back evil for evil to anyone
I am never to pay back evil for evil. To me, this is a statement that separates Christians from other major religions. I see this statement, but I admit, it is a hard one to follow, even in my own household. When I have been wronged or even when evil has been committed against me; when I have been shunned at work; when I am made to look like a fool; when I am not respected; when my authority is questioned; my natural inclination is to do something or say something toward that other person that discredits them. Again, Paul doesn't give commands that are natural to follow. He recognizes here that it is somewhat normal to pay back evil for evil.
How often have I heard the phrase, "I am going to get even with you?" As I watch movies and TV shows it is most often the reason behind the show. In crime shows, it is not just that a person will be caught for a crime they committed, but someone how something will happen to them that will try to equal the evil that they did.
Jesus says in Matthew 5:39, "But I say to you, do not resist an evil person; but whoever slaps you on your right cheek, turn the other to him also."
Matthew 5:44, "Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you."
So, what is my response to evil? It is to continue doing good. I think the mark of a Christian is his response to circumstances. My faith is not to waiver. I am to stand trusting in God no matter what. Romans 12:21 says, "Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good." Good is to rein in my life. As trials come, as hard times appear, as things occur that I don't understand, and when things well up inside of me, my response is simple, I am to remain doing the things that I do on any other day. I am to rise and surrender myself to the Lord and accept what He provides. I need to re-train myself in this way. I am too quickly trained to react and respond based upon what the world is training me.
Respect what is right in the sight of all men
The word respect is an interesting one. I think there is an idea in this word that means to "stop." I think there is this idea that before you respond or react in a way that is natural to you, I am to think before. I am to observe in advance. I am to notice beforehand or plan before. Again, I see a big failure in my life in this over and over. The moment I feel attacked I immediately respond. I don't think. And yet this is what I need to do. I need to stop and think about how to respond and then do it in a way, that if I were to line up a string of people from all walks of life and ask them all what they would do, there would be a right way of doing things and the majority would respond to that situation in that way. I am to do what is right in the sight of all men.
Promise: I must live my life God's way. I am not live in a way that is natural to me.
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